Infertility

The recovery continues.

I haven’t written a blog post for.. well, ages!
I’m not sure if I have lost my mojo, or if it’s a good sign that I feel like I have less to write about.
Maybe I feel more able to deal with the little things life can throw at me a bit better than I have in previous times.
Maybe I am recovering.
After all. That is what this blog was about.. originally that is.
When I started writing it, I wouldn’t get my laptop out and make a big deal out of writing the perfect blog post that was pretty and perfectly written. I just opened the app on my phone and wrote down what I was thinking. I wasn’t concerning myself with how many followers I have or might have once the post had been read. I just thought that by writing things down, I might feel a little better and that maybe someone out there might feel a little better for reading it too.
Today I am going back to basics, on my phone, no pretty pictures, just me and my thoughts and whoever wishes to read.
Today we took our niece out for the day while her parents had to work. We had a lovely breakfast and then went to the park. In the run up to today I had felt some nerves about spending what could be seen from an outsider as a ‘family day’. The fear of someone referring to me as her mother or as Hubby as her father. And having to explain.
In reality though today has been wonderful! She’s only 18 months but we both love her so much. I couldn’t stop looking at hubby with her. He loves her so unconditionally and it warms my heart to see. Today had the potential to trigger my anxiety. But it turns out I am entirely at peace. I feel happy that we spent time with her and spent time together in that scenario and enjoyed it. I didn’t feel stressed, I didn’t feel out of control. I just enjoyed time with my family. And felt privileged that this little girl likes to spend time with her Auntie and Uncle.
A year ago I never thought I could feel that way, I was so far from being able to see when I could get there. But I am, and I am so very proud of myself!

3 thoughts on “The recovery continues.

  1. Happy to hear you had a lovely day out with your niece & you were able to enjoy it. Something to celebrate for sure & something to be proud of.

    Liked by 1 person

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