My last post was basically a look back at the previous week, i got a lot from that, its great to review what you have done both good and bad, i find that it helps me get things straight in my head for the week ahead and of course this cant be a bad thing, especially when anxiety is concerned, although i am aware that i totally over analyse every part of my life and this, of course contributes to my anxiety, but it makes me feel more in control, and ultimately, what i crave in life is control, i think this is mostly down to my body taking my control over my child bearing abilities away from me! (damn you body)
But now i seem to have my thoughts a bit more in order and i have an outlet for all the thoughts and emotions in my new post IVF world, i think that i need to really challenge myself to make my life more positive, fulfilled and well.. happy, that sounds crazy i guess, but since i had a miscarriage (i was 3 months pregnant), last march, i honestly don’t recall ever lying in bed at night and thinking, ‘yes, today was good and i feel really, truly happy!’ Now don’t get me wrong, i’m not saying that nothing has made me happy and its all doom and gloom, iv’e had countless happy moments, we got engaged, been on holiday, spent quality time with my fabulous friends and family which i am so utterly grateful for!
But what i mean it to step back, look at life and think yeah, i’m happy right now, life is good..
so in order to work towards that, to really move on from all the pain and heartache associated with infertility, IVF and miscarriage, i am going to set myself goals, to begin with one a week, for now, i will set them, but i would love for you to get involved and suggest a positive goal for me to work towards for the day/week or even month, to help find my way through this new life i am living!
I have already achieved an unwritten goal i set for myself, to make this diagnosis and the negative way in which my IVF journey ended into a positive, i have started this blog which i get nothing but enjoyment from, but i want to help, to raise awareness of Early menopause, to prove that life after IVF can be OK, and to support and advise other people who are not quite at the same point i am!
Goal number one ; Research and speak to fertility charities, to enquire about being able to support and advise people with fertility issues.
Please let me know if you can help me achieve my weekly goal, i would really appreciate any help i can get!